For those who know me better than others, you are aware that death has haunted me for quite some time now.

I wrote about it in my book Dickinstein which came out in October 2013.

We lost my grandmother on Christmas Day 2014.

Three months later my step-father passed away.

2016 was the worst when we lost numerous heroes from George Michael on Christmas Day; Carrie Fisher, Richard Adams, Alan Thicke, Zsa Zsa Gabor, and John Glenn all in December. Janet Reno, Florence Henderson, Fidel Castro and Leon Russell in November. Gene Wilder in August. Muhammad Ali and Anton Yelchin in June. Alan Young (and Harambe the Gorilla) in May. Prince in April. Gary Shandling and Patty Duke in March. Harper Lee in February. David Bowie and Alan Rickman in January.

My heart also broke when we lost one of our beloved dogs in November last year.

Two of my long time pen pals also passed last year.

And then I lost my Dad on December 4th.

We lost another dog last month. And now John’s grandfather is close to the end.

I wanted to write this year, possibly another book, but haven’t been able to bring myself to do it. It’s hard to focus. Even this year on my blog I’ve barely managed to keep it alive by posting a quick log of each day, mostly mundane tasks I accomplish each day from what I had to eat to what I watched on TV. I’m getting bored with that so I know any readers I have are probably bored too.

I’ve been keeping this blog for a little over 10 years I think. I admit it’s always lacked focus. I’ve spent lots of time talking about writing, or reviewing books. I spent a year posting a pic a day. I tried writing a serial novel where I shared a chapter a week. I occasionally posted humorous antidotes or whatever was on my mind. Most of the stuff that really means anything to me has been kept private. I’ve even tried starting other blogs to focus on things but none of those ever worked out either.

But I’m going to try again.

I’m going to start work on some “op-ed” pieces just to get into the habit of at least writing something. They will be short stories, mostly nonfictional about my life and such.

I’m going to post them on a blog I started two years ago and never got far with: The Capote Review. So, if you are interested in reading them, check out that blog and add it to your reading list. I hope to at least post one a week. I’ve already posted my first blog post there today. There are 9 other blog posts still there from 2014 and 2015 if you want to read those too.

As for this blog, I’ve debated on making it entirely private by the end of this year and calling it quits. For now, I’ll continue with my Lone Writer’s Log Book posts for the entire year so I can at least feel like I have accomplished something.