Pussy Galore, Flicking the Bean, Dixie Normous, Porky Pig in Leather, Halle Berry, The Pink Panther…they may sound like an array of movie characters and sexual innuendos but they are also the names of martinis on the menu at Absolutli Goosed.
J and I arrived at the martini bar at about 8:30pm, 30 minutes earlier than his coworkers were scheduled to arrive. Absolutli Goosed is in the South Grand district near Tower Grove Park, nestled amongst other quaint little shops adorned in white stringed lights. It was raining, but we lucked out with parking right outside the front door.
I ordered a martini called Coffee and Donuts. It was a creamy blend of coffee and mocha with caramel on the rim. It was quite tastey. J had a reddish looking raspberry or apple thingy. At 9:15, his friends had still not arrived. I followed my Coffee and Donuts with a Mint Cookies and Cream martini topped with crushed Oreos. It tasted like mint chocolate chip ice cream. That was my last drink of the night since I was going to be driving us home.
J’s 2nd choice was something called a Limey Bastard, another creamy martini with a hint of lime. By now, one of his friends had arrived and helped herself to the Grey Goose martinis. J’s 3rd martini was an Appletini with something called 99 Apples in it. I took a sip. It was quite tastey, but I enjoyed a plain coke from a plastic cup and munched on chips and salsa.
While still waiting for 2 more friends to arrive, I ordered spinach dip served with some crunchy lil chip pieces that tasted like toasted pita bread. They were quite good. Finally, his last 2 friends arrived, a lovely coworker and her boyfriend. I had another coke. J had two more of his Appletinis. Laughter and good conversation filled the air.
Absolutli Goosed is a gay friendly red roomed martini bar where you can dress up or dress down, spend the entire evening there like we did, or its a great place to start with happy hour before moving on to a dance club. The wait staff is pleasant and knowledgable, and great at making suggestions if you find the humorous menu to be too overwhelming. Hip music is drowned out in the background. They have tables to sit at or you can belly up to the bar. The bathrooms are spacious and clean, and overall the atmosphere of this place is awesome! They even have outdoor seating for the summertime. We’d been there before at least over a year ago, but had such a great time last night that we will definitely make an effort to go back soon.
J and I had not been out in quite some time, so it was a nice evening out for us. I look forward to doing it again soon.


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